A Cautionary Tale…
Posted in Uncategorized on 09/16/2009 12:05 pm by siobhanA Cautionary Tale…
Today’s blog is a cautionary tale that will send a chill right to the heart of any fellow writers.
Are you sitting comfortably?
Good, because I can guarantee you’ll be squirming in your seat by the time you finish this.
Last week I had to interview a mega successful businessman for a financial magazine. One of the questions I asked him was, “What has been the most satisfying moment of your career to date?”
To which he replied, “Being able to buy my parents their dream home – seeing the look on their faces is a moment I’ll never forget.”
So I wrote up the article.
I edited the article.
I re-edited the article.
I sent it off to the editor of the magazine.
Then for some bizarre reason I decided to give the piece one final quick once over.
And discovered this absolute horror lurking in its midst:
What has been the most satisfying moment of your career to date?
Being able to buy my parents their dream home – seeing the look on their faeces is a moment I’ll never forget.
Just one little letter out of place was all it took to transform a moment of pure feel-good magic into something altogether more horrible.
I pictured readers recreating the scene in their minds:
“Mum and dad, without your love and support I would never have got where I am today, so please accept these keys to your dream home as a token of my gratitude.”
“Oh son, you shouldn’t have. We’re so grateful we have lost all control of our bowels…”
I told you it was horrible.
Even worse was having to ring the magazine concerned whilst on a crowded tube train and dictate the mis-written line to the editor at the top of my voice.
At least she found it hilarious!
09/16/2009 at 6:31 pm
Brilliant !
I once wrote about a woman who I described as ‘wrestling with her motions’ – and I really meant emotions……
Anna May x
09/16/2009 at 7:38 pm
Oh the joys of typos and spelling errors! Teaching myself I see many gems daily from my troop of seven year olds that are far too rude to post anywhere!
I recall one child very earnestly writing that one form of heinous vandalism is gravity. Well it may be vandalising my face, but really she didn’t need to get quite so personal!
09/16/2009 at 10:00 pm
HA ha ha! Brilliant. It reminds me of the time I made a display of books in the library in a fan-shape, and when I came back after leave it was gone. I asked where it was by crying, ‘Where’s my fanny display?’
09/17/2009 at 7:08 pm
These are brilliant! Darren and Anna, tonight I shall be dreaming of fanny displays and turd wrestling!!!
Lesley – I hope you failed that pupil – or at the very least got them to buy you a compensatory tub of Olay…
09/18/2009 at 9:36 am
There are whole books on these horrors. One of the most famous is ancient but still a favourite: Kitchener Flies Back to Front. My own favourites occurred in publications I have worked on: ‘Make and Play with Valerie Janitch’, ‘The Children are playing with their balls’ and ‘Knit yourself a sheath’. As a sub I pointed out the inappropriateness of the last one but the dear old lady who was editor at the time had no idea what I was talking about! Another well known boob was a headline in The Guardian above a story about the ‘Farts Council’.
Apparently many newspapers, including nationals, now believe that sub editors are unnecessary and writers can do their own proof reading and editing. This means there are bound to be many more hilarious cock ups. Oh joy.